Unfortunately most first dates are awkward and uncomfortable for all involved. However it doesn’t have to be that way. Here are some tips for your first tip that will leave her eagerly awaiting your next call.
The purpose of the first date
You’re getting together to find out more about each other and whether there’s something worth pursuing. If you’ve already decided that you love this woman and are desperate to be with her then you’ve already lost before you even begin. You want to get to know her and whether she would make a nice addition to your life… without treating her like she’s on a job interview.
Don’t build it up
The classic mistake I see in dating is building up expectations way too early. Just because you’ve had a few minutes of conversation with people does not mean you should spend the rest of your lives together! No matter how “hot” or “amazing” a woman may seem you have to keep in perspective that there are always plenty more women in the world.
Don’t be over eager to please
Being a kiss-ass is not being a man. If you bend over backwards to please a woman, compliment her excessively and generally act like you’re so blessed to be in her presence you’re going to kill all the attraction. She should want to hang out with you because she has a good time with you… not because you’re a suck up.
Look your best but be comfortable
Again there’s no point going over the top to impress your date. If you show up in a suit but as normally a ripped jeans type of guy then there’s only so long the illusion will last. If you really want to upgrade your image then it should be done for your entire life rather than just on dates.
Keep it short
First dates from hell occur when you have nothing in common but you’re stuck together for a long period of time. You’re better off meeting for a coffee or drink (although watch the alcohol) so there’s no pressure on either of you to stick around if it’s just not working out. If things go well then you can always order another or go somewhere else but don’t overstay your welcome either.
Let her talk
The easiest way to have a successful first date is to let the woman talk about herself. If she mentions a trip to South America then ask her about it. Where did she go? What did she do? Any interesting travel experiences etc? Having a great first date has a lot to do with your ability to make conversation with strangers so work on this skill with all sorts of people you meet.
I’m not sure if this goes without saying but both of you should enjoy your first date. The more fun a woman has the more likely she is to want the second date so keep it light and enjoyable. You know you’re having a great date when there’s a lot of laughter and fun going on.
If you’re going to kiss her… prepare her for it
There’s nothing worse than the “we’re at the end of the date oh no do I kiss her or not?” scenario. If things are going well then you want to carefully escalate your physical contact throughout the date so you’re ready for the kiss at the end. Then it can be natural for you to be standing close as she looks up into your eyes… voila
Be prepared but don’t expect it
There’s always a chance that you’ll end up alone at your place at the end of the night. I wouldn’t plan for it, I wouldn’t expect it, I wouldn’t even hope for it as it will distract you… but I would be prepared for it. So make sure your place is also looking its best but still comfortable as well just in case.
These first date tips will serve you well but if I could emphasise any one point it would be that you don’t need to put your date up on a pedestal. With the concepts you’re learning on this website you should never be at a loss for women to date. So don’t act like she’s doing great charity work just going out with you.
You – just like everyone else – are worthy of a great relationship so believe in yourself and have fun out there.